Category Archives: Procrastination

Never Stop Writing

The Insecure Writer’s Support Group

This month’s question is: If you ever did stop writing, what would you replace it with?

Never Stop Writing

At a recent monthly writer’s meeting, where we were going around updating members on what we were doing writing-wise, I made the announcement of:

After 53 years of writing, I have finally found my niche.

My announcement got a laugh. It was the truth, and I know others could probably relate, though I doubt any of the others were older than me or have been writing as long as I have.

I started writing when I was 19. I received my first byline when I was 25. The genres and fields of writing, most of which include more bylines and publications have been in:

  • Poetry
  • Nonfiction how-to book
  • How-to articles
  • Short stories – romances, mysteries
  • Erma Bombeck-like essays about life, motherhood, and marriage, which became a weekly newspaper column for five years
  • Children’s novel.
  • Romance novels
  • National organization in-house magazine columns
  • Mystery novel, series
  • Screenplays – I LOVE writing screenplays!
  • More poetry, with some education behind it
  • Playwriting
  • Flash Fiction
  • Literary fiction – short stories
  • Creative nonfiction
  • Academic papers – oh dear god, there were so many
  • Ph.D. Dissertation – nonfiction at its most boring.
  • Epic Fantasy novel – would be my first book published as an indie publisher
  • Cookbook
  • Anthology – both as an editor and contributor
  • Romance novella series
  • How-to resource books for writers
  • Psychological thrillers aka Gothic mystery

It’s this last genre where I am enraptured, enthused, impassioned, and excited beyond measure to be writing. I toyed with the genre while working on my cop suspense script and my horror script, but right now, these two projects are worlds away from what I’ve done in the past.

After 53 years of writing, I have finally found my niche. My advice for any writer is, if you love writing, don’t ever stop. You never know when you’ve finally hit your stride. The thought of replacing that writing time with something else was never appealing enough. It only made me write more.

To appear in fall 2023 in the Greater Detroit Romance Writers’ anthology:

Harbor House: Say You Will

A Historical Gothic Romance Novella

1922 – Two men want her. One she proposed to years ago; the other she’s about to marry. Both are telling lies. Both become involved when she starts to repair and restore the isolated Lake Huron Island home her lumber baron grandfather deserted when his wife died giving birth to her father, and which she wants to turn into a luxury vacation hotel. One of the two men is secretly scandalizing her family, using the home for unlawful activities. The other can save her family and reveal the crimes. During the restoration, she happens upon a mysterious locked door that puts her life in danger.

To appear in 2024:

Harbor House: Last Blood

A Gothic Psychological Paranormal Thriller

When she discovers, via a DNA test her boyfriend gifts her with, that she’s the last relative of a lumber baron who lived in northern Michigan on the shores of Lake Huron, she wants to restore the large island home to its former glory and turn it into a vacation B&B. Shortly upon her arrival, the home’s ghostly past makes itself known, putting her life in danger, forcing her to question everything, including her own sanity.

What do you think? Are you excited, too?


Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writers. This group is all about connecting!

The Art of Mastering (or Avoiding) Procrastination

Are you thinking about the novel (or any project) you want to start or finish but you find yourself procrastinating about it? Or, is it writer’s block that has you pausing?

Do you find yourself wondering if procrastination and writer’s block are one and the same, or could they be kissing cousins?

Do you ever wonder why you’re procrastinating?

What would you say to learning that there’s a science and purpose to procrastination no matter how much you desire in accomplishing it?

Did you know that different brain waves affect your creativity?

Did you know procrastination can be dealt with head-on or subtly without anguish and pain?

Want to uncover the roots of your procrastination, so that you can get writing again or move forward on your dream desire?

Got a project that you’ve been struggling with in either finishing or starting? If so, come join my June 5-16 Master Class, Using (& Avoiding) Procrastination.

By using any or all of my methods offered, procrastination will never be your master again.

But, act fast! Don’t procrastinate about signing up! The class is limited to 25 people!

From time to time, Dr. Stout acknowledges that she procrastinates, but now, she knows exactly why she’s doing it. Considering she published 4 books last year and is on her way to publishing 4 or 5 this year, she feels she’s mastered the beast. Procrastinating is now a choice with reason. Her classes and presentations are about sharing what she’s learned, wanting to help others reach their greatest desires.


Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writer – aim for a dozen new people each time – and return comments. This group is all about connecting!

How to Write When Struggling – Part 1

When struggling with characters, plot, interest, or the writing

In wanting to write a new blog, I started going through my TO BE WRITTEN file of blog ideas. I came across a copy of Maggie Doonan’s blog, “4 Signs It’s Time to Quit a Writing Project,” remembering how much I had originally disagreed with each one of those signs even though much of what she had to say was good advice. Those 4 signs in her blog are:

  1. You’re struggling to flesh out your characters
  2. You can’t get the plot to make sense
  3. You’re not excited by the story
  4. You’re finding writing harder than normal

I think in the beginning of my writing career that I might have agreed with that list but I rarely threw anything out. In thinking about my own writing career and projects that I started, put aside, and ended up working on later, I disagree with each one of those signs and here’s why.  

When struggling with characters

In the early days of my writing when there was no Internet, I submitted through the mail. One particular rejection that I still remember forty years later was that my characters were flat.

Having flat characters is a common problem for both new and experienced writers. My characters are always flat in the beginning. Why? Because I don’t know enough about them. Oh, I might know their hair color, height, their goal for the story, and the external conflict they’ll face, and possibly even an internal conflict, also known as their wound—usually emotional or psychological—but I don’t know why they have that internal conflict, that angst, that deep, dark wound that is buried so deep and is so secret that it drives every bit of their goals, words, and actions.

My job is to go digging. Or, as I call it: journaling. I write in first person as if I’m that person, writing a journal/diary entry. Usually, it starts with where *I* went to school, what I like to do, who my friends are, and by the time I’m into the second page—of a single-spaced document—I’m fully in that character’s head. I have become them. I’m able to feel their emotions and start asking questions as if I was a third person interviewer, How did you feel when that happened? What did you do? Why do you think you’ve hung onto those feelings all this time? And, so forth.

By the time, I’m done, I often have three-to-four full pages. I’m exhausted. But, I always discover that deepest, darkest secret they never want anyone learning. I learn how it drives every decision they’re making now. That secret/wound becomes their character arc, the thing they have to resolve before they can achieve their external goal, which will include getting the girl or guy if the story is a romance. If not a romance, it’s a toss-up whether the story will be bittersweet or happily ever after.

When struggling with plot

Generally, I discovered I was struggling with plot because I didn’t know my characters well enough. After all, without character, there is no plot. Their external goal drives their initial action(s), but it’s their internal wound that drives their reactions both in thought and deed.

If I was still struggling with plot after going back and digging deeper into my characters psyche, then I don’t have enough external conflict coming at them. I don’t have a conflict equal to their strengths and knowledge. Every main character has to have an adversary that has a great chance of taking that character’s goal away from them. Dealing with plot is all about heaping on the drama, the tragic events, the problematic people.

When I’m struggling with interest in the story

If I’m becoming bored with the story, it’s either because I don’t know my character(s) well enough or I don’t have enough drama blocking their way.

Plus, if I’m bored with the story, readers will be bored, too.

The only way to fix my characters is to work with them, digging deep into inner cores until I’ve fallen in love with them and want to be with them even when away from the computer because they’ve become more interesting than even my best friends.

If they can make me laugh, make me sigh, or make me cry, then that disinterest has disappeared.

I know I’ve succeeded falling in love with them when I forget to eat, lose track of time when at the computer, and when I wake up wanting to be at the computer as soon as possible.

When I’m struggling to write

I’ll admit that I can be a procrastinator, one who is highly side-tracked with the ring of new mail, seeing the number of notifications sitting in Facebook or Twitter. I can get lost in the rabbit hole of research of some new science, a moment in history I never knew about, or as in today’s news, the political scene, or the new numbers of this pandemic virus that has a stranglehold on most of us.

Generally, when I’m struggling, it’s because I’ve allowed myself to be distracted.

To create a better writing habit again, I now have an accountability partner. Most every day, we communicate by video or text where we set our writing goals, and then at the end of the day, we message each other, stating what we did, whether we met those goals or not. As a result, both of us are writing far more than we’ve done in the past.

Is there ever a time I leave a project behind?

Rarely.

Some projects have taken time. Grendel’s Mother, which I published in 2016, was a ten-year project from start to finish. For most of that time, in two different large chunks of time as in years, it sat on the shelf. The first time was because I was stuck with the plot. I discovered I needed to do more research. I went and reread Beowulf again and got some more ideas. The second time was because I’d returned to school for my last degree.

Another project was a children’s novel I had written. The story was cute, but not interesting enough. Also, it had been the first full novel I had written and served as a learn-as-you-go project. I wrote it when my oldest daughter was in fourth grade. Three decades later, she’s teaching fourth-grade and when helping me go through my shelves one day, she said that the characters were still memorable. At least I got that element right back then! Today, we’re planning on rewriting it together adding some sci-fi to the plot…someday.

There were two short-short children’s stories that I finally and recently tossed. The market just isn’t there for me. Plus, I wasn’t interesting in investing any more time in them.

Also, I tossed out a number of ideas that didn’t have any real writing behind them. They were just ideas and today, I have no enthusiasm for them.

My first romance ever written—the one where the characters were flat? I recycled the setting, leaving behind the characters and plot and wrote a different romance. Traditionally published in 1997, I revised and updated it, changed the cover, and the title from New Beginnings to Love’s New Beginnings, publishing it last year. The book got a 5-star review rating from Kat Henry Doran, the owner of Wild Women Reviews.

All this said, these past few months have not been normal. I, too, have struggled to write during March and April. Eventually, in May, I found my way.

My next blog will talk about how I’ve been able most of the time to overcome this unusual time as we cope with a dangerous virus. They may be tricks you can use both in the normal and abnormal times.

Down the Rabbit Hole a.k.a. Life’s Little Hiccups & Big Booms

I’m behind in my writing.

Again.

I wish I could say that I don’t know how it happens, but I do.

While I accuse Life of sticking out its foot and tripping me so that I’ll look funny with arms flailing as I attempt to regain my balance and where other times I just fall badly, needing time to get back up and recover, it’s a lie.

Small trip-ups have been flat tires, weather issues that mess up my plans, tripping over my feet and bruising my shin and skinning my knee, bumping into furniture corners, dropping dishes of food on the floor, forgetting to pay a bill on time…

Big Booms occur when there’s a huge life-event for someone close to me such as an illness or death, where my computer is having major issues that take days to fix, or being in a multi-car accident that totals my car.

One thing I do know is that Life loves to mess up my plans. No, that’s not true either. Life has no emotions, no feelings. Life has no purpose, no goal, no intention.

Life just is.

A rabbit hole where our time escapes us in a reality of unrealism.

During the last six weeks, I’ve been dealing with an illness of my own creation, the worst kind of rabbit hole. Because of allergies, I’m no longer able to eat dairy foods. Of. Any. Kind.

Goodbye pizza, my beloved. Goodbye favorite comfort foods of lasagna, spaghetti, macaroni & cheese.

Ice cream!?  NO! You can’t leave! How will I survive without you?

It was that love of ice cream that got me in trouble. I didn’t just eat it once. I ate it five days in a row! Feeling no consequences, I was safe, right?

Wrong.

After much consultation, blood tests, and journaling what I ate and reactions, my rabbit hole unreality now consists of avoiding foods that are processed; all foods that I’m allergic to (tomatoes, garlic, vanilla, pork, hazelnut, raspberries, blueberries, casein, cow’s milk, pineapple, cauliflower, coffee, cashew, lemon, salmon, pear, orange, peas, green pepper, kidney bean, paprika, cod, flounder, cola nut, peanut, pecan, and sesame); all sugar except raw honey and pure maple syrup; and all grains, first because of the gluten that I have to avoid, and because I believe our grains are saturated with poisons that have been eliminated in every other country except ours.

To sum it up, I have a leaky gut and six months ago, my body’s inflammation level was at 20%. Today, my inflammation is down to just over 4%. I suspect most of that inflammation was in my gut. And, I was feeling great.

Well, at least I did until I consumed that daily week-long ice cream agenda.

Stupid me.

So, how did these past six weeks become a rabbit hole because I ate ice cream? Quite simply, my body reacted, culminating from an allergic reaction to what I thought was bronchitis. Even the doctor thought so when I went in after four weeks trying to control an uncontrollable cough. The prescription was steroids.

Two weeks later, I went to my regular doctor and discovered it wasn’t bronchitis at all. It was an infected sinus that required an antibiotic, not steroids.

For that six weeks, day after day I lay there, a couch potato with no energy, not even for reading, just thinking about my writing, or rather the lack of it as I felt as if I had become a professional procrastinator.

No one could help me. Only I had the power to climb out of this rabbit hole.

Life isn’t going to rest on its laurels and leave me without trip-ups and big booms.

At the end of my rabbit-hole journey, I’ve learned two things:

First, good health can’t be taken for granted. If I choose to eat stupidly in the future, I will have a stupid outcome. There’s no more thinking that this will be a test. Maybe there’s a chance…  No! The results are in; the food is forbidden.

Second, my writing can’t be taken for granted either. That if I want to write, I have to choose to write. During those major rabbit-hole BOOMS!, I will consider what I learned during my rabbit-hole summer, which I originally posted last fall.

Overall, however, there is no white knight, er white rabbit that I can follow.

It’s all on me.

—

My Rabbit Hole Summer – originally published October 2, 2018, Only for the Brave blog

Where did the summer go?

Here it is, the beginning of October, solidly into fall, and as I look back at this past year, I feel that I have nothing to show for it. What did I do all that time?

More accurately, I know what I didn’t do. Writing.

I thought about writing a lot. I talked about it even more.  And, I took a number of classes to learn how to become a better writer.  So, I guess, there is that. I did learn a lot through the various classes. Rebecca (Becca) Syme’s class, Writing Better Faster was just what I needed to get me out of my slump.

In her class, I discovered the big reason why I wasn’t writing. I’ve learned that major life-events shut down my creative process.  While I can edit, polish, and get a manuscript formatted, it’s impossible for me to create new words on a new project, meaning getting a first draft done is extremely difficult.

When I think back over other life-events when I wasn’t writing, I remember my sister dying while I was writing my dissertation, which was technical, non-fiction writing, not creative by any means. Because the writing was non-creative and I had a deadline, I was able to bury myself into the task. At the time, I felt like she was always with me, looking over my shoulder as I worked because it as the type of writing she would have done, which were non-fiction journalism pieces. She was really good at it.

Becca’s class was a month-long class and included taking three psychological-type personality tests, which I had done two previously at work and the last through another recent class.  Using those results and meeting with Becca one-on-one through Skype, I discovered there was a logical reason for my so-called writing silence over the summer, in fact for the past year. Where I was activity driven to clean out files, both electronic and paper, clean out and reorganize my bookshelves, go through the stacks of magazines and read piles of articles I’d saved, and other such activities. Another life-event had occurred.

What made Becca’s class special is that she took these test results, which in business was used to see how I fit in with my peers, and she attached them toward my writing. She was able to tell me what my best writing styles and techniques were and how I should use them to become a better writer and/or a faster writer!

For someone who likes to know the why behind anything, I was hoping for some aha moments and I got them. Several in fact. The biggest aha moment was the one I shared above. When I learned that, I stopped beating myself up, and stopped thinking I had been lazy.

Now, I’m better able to plan my schedule based on my new-realized strengths and can easily deal with the other tasks that received major procrastination. I now know how to deal with them.

Are you interested in finding out how you can become a better and/or faster writer? Becca gives classes every other month.

To join the class, go here: https://www.margielawson.com/product/oct-2018-write-better-faster

If you’d rather be notified about an upcoming class, here’s that link: https://forms.aweber.com/form/54/2064782054.htm

Here’s the link to sign up for her newsletter: https://forms.aweber.com/form/83/26292183.htm

As to my writing: I’m happy to report that over the weekend I finished the first draft of Burning Desire, the second of my Laurel Ridge novellas. And I’m now developing the characters for Arrested Pleasures, the third story in the series.

Woohoo!

—

March 30, 2019 Update: Arrested Pleasure‘s first draft is written, and the characters and plots for the remaining four novellas in the series have been developed.

Looks like I might not be as behind as I thought. 🙂